I have fallen off the wagon. The ‘do-nothing’ wagon, that is. I realized today very suddenly that my resolutions had fallen away and I had got caught up again in the ever-turning wheel of things that need to be done, as if I could somehow slow or stop this wheel from turing. But this wheel never stops, or slows—all I can do is step away from it for a rest before it grinds me down like a millstone grinding flour.
The problem with riding this merry-go-round is that I wind myself up with lists and chores and actions to take, and then take my frantic revolutions out on the people I love most. I make them ride this wheel too, and maybe they will start to think that they can only be loved for what they do, not who they are. I know how this feels, and I know how wrong it is. So the only thing to do is to jump off, now!
Resting every day is a chance to be still and unproductive, like a fallow field. I’ll grow and harvest more, if I rest regularly. I may not do some things, but perhaps I’ll actually have a better experience and leave a better impression on my children this way. I just need to keep not doing.
-- Tristan Boyer Binns
Tristan Boyer Binns is a Certified Iyengar Yoga Teacher. She teaches in Newtonville, MA, and loves the slightly dreamy, unfocused look students have coming out of Savasana. When people have that look and also a buzz of energy in their hearts and limbs, she knows the class has been a good one!